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Happiness Is Weird

by Freddie Stevenson

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1.
Indestructible heart You never give up You refuse to fall apart The dusk is cold and the dawn is dark But in the dead of the night There shines your tiny spark I don’t mind these hard times They’ll pass away And I’ll wake up singing On a brand new day Indestructible heart You’ve loved and you’ve lost And now you’re right back at the start Winter dreams of summers past But spring will arrive With the blossom and the lark I don’t mind these dark times They’ll fade away And I’ll wake up singing On a brand new day Indestructible heart
2.
The people I’ve been I never became The past it seems Is subject to change By the white cliffs of Dover They had my back to the wall But I’ll take a hangover Over nothing at all I’ve been picking up What you’ve been putting down There’s more than enough To go around Beauty is human And truth is truth That’s just an opinion It’s not an excuse In the Egyptian twighlight I’ve been counting my breaths Sitting with the mountains to my east And the desert to my west If she’s too small Make yourself minuscule If she’s too tall Climb up on a stool And kiss her, you fool I was standing beside The river of bliss I saw you swimming by And I couldn’t resist I’ll fight to the death Or I’ll fall on my sword Staying one step ahead of the devil But two steps behind the Lord You say the best things in this life Are free Would you forgive me If I profoundly disagreed? Everyone’s dreaming A dream so obscure Beauty is dreaming about the beast But the beast ain’t dreaming about her I’ve sailed on the ocean And I’ve flown through the air I don’t believe in ghosts But I see them everywhere She’s undressing By the ever-renewing pool So sign your confession And saddle up your mule And kiss her, you fool
3.
Birds burst from branches A cobweb caught a tear What are the chances That I would find you here? Old men drink whiskey Young men drink rye I wonder if you miss me When the moon is in your eye Open all the windows Unbolt the heavy doors When it’s over There will be no applause Chaos on the highways Chaos in the skies above I want you to walk my way Down the rocky road of love I want you in the mornings I want you in the nights In Lisbon and New Orleans In Hacienda Heights Wrap me up in winter The voice of sorrow warns When it’s over There will be no applause A light is shining On the other side Can you hear me, darling? It’ll be alright I’ve heard the hidden music Weave among the stars I’ve lived with pickpockets In a house of broken hearts In the hour of no illusions There’s a truth that I must face A heart that’s blind to darkness Is a heart that’s blind to grace Deck the aisle with orchids Take my hand in yours When it’s over There will be no applause A light is shining On the other side Can you hear me, darling? It’ll be alright
4.
Walking through the desert, two dogs on a leash One called Patience, the other called Haste Looking everywhere for that golden fleece I don’t have a moment to waste Coyotes growl, Mama Bear moans Stockbrokers howl down telephones Was it a mirage Or was it a glimpse of your face? Now all of the muses are laughing at me For taking myself so seriously Describing your beauty With a trembling pen When I left the city they demanded my key So I bowed my head, went down on one knee And ceremoniously Returned it to them Now I’m a long long long long way I’m a long way from Bethlehem Liquor store’s closed, chivalry’s dead A shadow passed over my eyes The blood of the rose flows sickly and red Under cold inscrutable skies Dressed to the nines in my grandmother’s car Rolling with a belly full of love I’m wondering, did I take it too far Did I not take it far enough? It’s always too early until it’s too late I can still hear the sound of the smashing of plates I know my salvation will come I just don’t know when Wintertime’s passing, there’s a riot in the air She looks to the east with flowers in her hair My heart becoming a cradle Of utter mayhem A long long long long way A long way from Bethlehem She hooked me the moment she looked in my eyes Moonlight light cloaked in a woman’s disguise The breeze leaving the trees Like an amen Petals are falling, I’m holding the stem I’ve heard the warnings, I’m ignoring them My brow is aflame The world glows like a gem But I’m a long long long long way I’m a long way from Bethlehem
5.
She plucked me out of the catacombs And ushered me into the presence of desire The lightening writhes and the thunder moans She pokes a little life into the fire I willingly relinquish all my sovereignty She crawls towards me giggling Mouth pressed to the windowpane in the lashing rain Cry out she won’t be listening And oh, you’ll find me where the black orchid grows Kneeling at the feet of a vacant throne When the ship of sorrow sails home She dreams of me in deepest sleep Gifted with powers of prophesy and mischief Creatures crawl out of her sea Jaws on the floor as she whispers all my secrets At dawn I walk across her lawn My clothes are torn my feet are bare and bleeding Her lovers come her lovers go I wave hello and goodbye when they’re leaving And oh, you’ll find me where the black rooster crows Polishing a stone within a stone When the ship of sorrow sails home I am calling I am calling I am calling Come home If faith is knowing that life is wise Her spies must have tailed me for some reason I’m frozen ‘neath the midnight sun I’m done looking for something to believe in Burn my vows, my sacred cows Let the ashes flash on edge of evening A naked woman and a naked man Are walking hand in hand back to Eden And oh, you’ll find me where the black river flows Silence singing in my bones When the ship of sorrow sails home I am calling I am calling I am calling Come home
6.
The time has come to raise the anchor From the sad harbour of the past The time has come for me to thank her I’m so glad I crossed her path Setting sail under restless thunder She was waving from the bay The fires of autumn falling round her As she turned and walked away Some things come at a heavy cost And it’s enough to break your heart But everything you’ve ever loved and lost Is shining in the dark like stars Shining in the dark There’s no beginning, no middle, no end And I’m crossing open ground I’d trade it all for a single friend But there is no-one around In the old days when they broke a vase They’d patch it up with joins of gold Don’t give up, don’t throw it all away As long as she cracks, she holds Some things come at a heavy cost And it’s enough to break your heart But everything you’ve ever loved and lost Is shining in the dark like stars Shining in the dark
7.
I got so close to loving you I could almost taste your kiss Walking down this stony road Through this land of boredom and bliss A falling leaf fell past my face I glimpsed a shooting star I got so close to loving you But I couldn’t travel that far I got so close to loving you Your blade pressed to my neck When the tide was low the treasure glowed Through the ribs of the old shipwreck You spoke your spell, the curtain fell To cries of confusion and woe I got so close to loving you But forever was too far to go Kelvinbridge fell down on my head My sweet lady still lingers her delicate fingers Rifling through the pockets of the dead I got so close to loving you You were the crème de la crème But the goose-stepping crows And the frog-marching toads Are dividing the us from the them I saw you complete in the furious heat Of a moment of total insight I got so close to loving you But you rolled over and turned off the light Kelvinbridge fell down on my head My sweet lady still lingers her delicate fingers Rifling through the pockets of the dead
8.
First I mistook her for the Virgin Mary She mistook me for some rock n’ roll star Her heart was a cave I was the miner’s canary Playing scales on the rain’s guitar I was drinking too much I wasn’t sleeping enough up Carousing with savages and kings Things had to change when I was mugged and roughed up Behind a nail salon in Colorado Springs But even when our brows were bloodied Beating our heads against the wall Were were makin’ it to heaven We were makin’ it to heaven We were makin’ it to heaven after all I feed the alligators and I bleed the radiators I scrimp and save I’m shadow-boxing Every now and again me and Magdelana Make love like the boss ain’t watching Come all ye unfaithful let your hearts not be hateful Come sail with me across this fiery sea The price of life can make you feel grateful That they throw in death for free Like the howling of dogs those winter gods Are rising with a dying fall But we’re makin’ it to heaven Yes we’re makin’ it to heaven We’re makin’ it to heaven after all Black crow caws, wild cat roars The stallion is kicking the stall And we’re makin’ it to heaven Yes we’re makin’ it to heaven We’re are makin’ it to heaven after all
9.
You look as good as sin with that Mephistophelian grin Gazing at the heavens, plucking feathers from your wings My mind’s on fire, memories flee for their lives And swim towards oblivion across the wine dark sea of time There’s a skeleton at the banquet, there’s a leper at the ball The early roses weep in the fleeting democracy of snowfall Box up your beliefs, she said, put up them bedroom shelves The reality you seek is hidden even from itself I said that’s gotta be the understatement of the century I still believe in love Slender Aphrodite strokes a purring pussy cat They say she can whip a gallon of cream in three minutes flat Napoleon in my daydreams lays in a pool of light His situations a little heavy and his pants are a little tight These days I stay up late worrying about the world Wishing the moon would become a saviour or maybe just a girl Climb into my bed, she said, don’t leave me here alone My heart might be a wilderness but my heart’s your only home I said that’s gotta be the understatement of the century I still believe in love I’ve never met a businessman who isn’t afraid of death We get drunk on the myth of endless time when there is no whiskey left Here comes the green mermaid queen, there goes the neighbourhood From this even the milky way would turn away if she only could Visions form and visions fade, fall apart and reassemble Like a bull burned from his barn I look at the sunset and I tremble Don’t take this personally, she said, but Fred, you don’t exist Put down that ragged alphabet, come here, give me a kiss I said that’s gotta be the understatement of the century I still believe in love Low clouds over Memphis, midnight’s late for his shift Harbourless immensities surround all this In the local mega-church they’re raking the faithful in With a cup of free trade coffee and salvation from your sins Love floods my molecules but this sadness just won’t budge Wether I like it or not I’ve got to stand up and be judged Tear your eyes from Eden, she said, we don’t belong there anymore You’ve got to cross this ocean even if there is no other shore I said that’s gotta be the understatement of the century I still believe in love

credits

released July 2, 2020

Mastered by Joe Chester.

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Freddie Stevenson Glasgow, UK

Albums 'Body on the Line', 'All My Strange Companions', '50 Songs', 'The City Is King', 'The Brightening/The Darkening'. A Dirty Urchin of NYC. Co-writing and touring with the Waterboys. Lives in Scotland.

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